Red Flags in a New Friendship
My non-negotiables
Prompt: Who is your oldest friend?
I don’t think about it much because it’s heartbreaking and a subconscious trait throughout my family history. The simple version is that I don’t have any friends; over the years, those I thought were friends grew apart. I don’t have the luxury to call and vent, go on vacations and meet up for brunch. Thinking quickly, I can’t name each of my family members’ best friends or oldest friends.
Early this year, I joined a Facebook group dedicated to those making friends. I introduced myself, met someone twice, and last spoke to them a while ago. Knowing this, I decided to throw the paint on the wall and see what sticks. Before I made that decision, I decided to run by my experiences with my family to see if I was in my head or making a mistake. I believe in redos, so in the first meeting, I blamed the nerves, so I decided to meet up for the second time to see if there was a difference, and there wasn’t a difference.
Although the encounters didn’t end up how I would’ve liked, I learned some valuable lessons, and it exposed me to my likes and dislikes. I don’t see the satisfaction of name-dropping, and I doubt this person even knows I write. I don’t see the reason to name her; the point of this piece is to list some of my non-negotiables regarding adult friendships.
